By Dan Neil
IN THE BARROOM brawl that is the premium-compact SUV segment,
the new Mercedes-Benz GLB is a walkaway knockout. Daimler will sell
all they can make. It is trucking adorable. Readers should brace
themselves for the word "neoteny."
Meanwhile: the GLB ($36,600 base MSRP) is a new body-style
variant built out of the same box of parts as the GLC SUV. Sitting
sideways under the hood is the strong, well-tempered 2.0-liter
four, a turbo-gasser producing 221 hp and 258 lb-ft, ahead of an
eight-speed dual-clutch automatic and front-wheel drive. The
permanent all-wheel drive 4MATIC system is a $2,000 option.
Adorable, and affordable. In fact, the MSRP for this whelping
seal of Stuttgart is right on top of the average price for a new
car in the U.S. -- a data-intersect I would never have imagined in
Daimler's prouder days.
I love the new reasonableness on the entry level. Our test
vehicle, a GLB 250 4MATIC priced at $50,480, ticked all sorts of
boxes, from its LED headlamps to taillamps, including: a panoramic
sunroof; 19-inch wheels; adaptive suspension damping; heated front
seats and steering wheel; as well as the Driver Assistance Package,
from Active Lane Keeping Assist to Evasive Steering Assist -- the
sound of which alarms even me, who is technology's trusting
fool.
I drove the GLB at a press event last week, from Phoenix to
Sedona and back, on some lovely farm roads and the beautiful Red
Rock Scenic Byway. During the day's driving, and my occasional
bursts of unsympathetic acceleration, our tester felt fully alert,
plenty composed and corner-confident -- although sometimes I felt
like I was rodeo-riding a Shetland pony.
The GLB's manners are quite agreeable, considering the tiny
wheelbase. The front strut suspension is paired with a multi-link
rear axle with steel springs. Our tester included
adaptive/multi-mode damping, accessible through the Dynamic Select
switch. I preferred the Sport mode, which gives the GLB slightly
flintier damping and body-roll resistance. Even with, the saddle
stayed supple.
The GLB feels small because it is small -- in length, slightly
shorter than the GLC, on a wheelbase tightened 1.7 inches. And yet
it's the GLB that gets the third-row seating option. This back seat
is no flip-and-fold hellhole, either. In the interests of keeping
Daimler's lawyers happy, I'm sure, it comprises two fully
upholstered bucket seats on mounting rails, with three-point belts,
adjustable headrests, armrests and full-window air bags, as well as
cupholders and charge ports.
With its seat backs upright, this itty-bitty settee takes up
most of the available cargo space, sparing only a narrow 5.1 cubic
feet behind the seat back. But if you are a carpooling family -- as
ours happens to be at the moment -- the third row can offer a lot
of short-range seating in a petite, snazzy footprint.
How's it feel back there? For strapping lads, it will feel a bit
like crawling into a padded recycling bin. However, the second-row,
40:20:40 split-fold seats slide forward up to 6 inches, for better
access and legroom. Children are bendy that way and they almost
never get thrombosis.
But it won't be practicality that moves the GLB's tin. As
compared with the urbanely styled GLC with which it shares so much
mechanically, the GLB was re-skinned to look rougher and tougher,
more lifestyle-adventurous and utilitarian -- to read like a tough
widdle SUV, a miniature sled dog straining its harness. The
windshield angle is more vertical, the hood is more proud, the
headlamps assemblies mounted higher, the grill more bluff, and the
rear hatch more square -- all landmarks moved in the direction of
utility.
Note also the rounded shoulder line and large side windows, with
a pronounced inward-canting of the canopy, very like ein grösser
Mini Countryman. At the GLB's front and rear, what the company
calls "optical underride guards." I think that means they are for
looks only, but my German is a little rusty.
Another illusion is rendered by the full-length roof rails that
visually raise the profile, making it appear more pugnacious and
close-coupled, without paying the cost in increased frontal area,
aero drag and reduced efficiency. Without the roof rails the GLB
would look like it had lost its toupee.
To be clear, all this off-road show brings almost nothing by way
of additional go, over the GLC. In both cars, the 4MATIC's settings
include a low-traction mode in which engine torque is split 50/50
between the front and rear axles, working with an active
multi-plate rear differential. But even with that, Mercedes-Benz
says the GLB supports only "easy off-road terrain away from paved
roads." Rommel's halftrack it is not.
But it is cute, plainly and demonstrably precious, wee, winsome,
adorbs, that emoji with hearts for eyes... If you love it on sight,
just know these feelings, and any sudden check-writing urges, have
been deliberately evoked.
Dig a bit deeper into the GLB's appeal and your shovel might hit
the word "neoteny." The biologist Stephen Jay Gould argued that
humans and many domestic animals evolved to retain their juvenile
features longer, because there were evolutionary advantages to
being cute, including the love and protection of caregivers.
Product design can easily press those buttons. Whosey woosey a big
SUV? You are!
Among the GLB's talking points is the graphics-soaked MBUX
infotainment system, which lives inside the widescreen display
spread behind the steering wheel and over the kooky air vents. The
widescreen puts handsome configurable displays in front of the
driver and, within reach of the passenger, a bottomless wishing
well of touchpad and touch screen menus dialing up comfort, comms
and setup options. These include the optional "augmented reality"
navigation cues and a natural speech voice-command, which can be
summoned with a simple, "Hey, Mercedes."
Except, every time my driving partner or I said the "M" word in
conversation, the car would interrupt: "How can I help you?" a
cheery disembodied voice would ask. I would say, "Nothing, sorry,
no." It would respond with awkward silence. "What would you like to
do?" "Cancel!" we yelled. "Thank you!" Awkward silence. That went
on all day.
A technology still in its infancy.
2020 Mercedes-Benz GLB 250 4MATIC
Base Price: $38,600
Price, as Tested: $50,480
Powertrain: Front transverse-mounted, turbocharged and
direct-injected 2.0-liter four-cylinder gas engine; eight-speed
dual-clutch automatic transmission with manual-shift mode;
front-biased all-wheel drive with up to 50/50 torque split,
front/rear, and electromechanical, multi-plate limited-slip rear
differential
Power/Torque: 221 hp at 5,500 rpm/258 lb-ft at 1,800-4,000
rpm
Length/Width/Height/Wheelbase: 182.4/79.5 (with
mirrors)/65.3/111.4 inches
Curb Weight: 3,759 pounds
0-60 mph: 6.9 seconds
EPA Fuel Economy: 23/31/26 mpg, city/highway/combined
Cargo Capacity: 62.0/22.0 cubic feet (behind 1st row/2nd
row)
Write to Dan Neilat Dan.Neil@wsj.com
The Wall Street Journal is not compensated by retailers listed
in its articles as outlets for products. Listed retailers
frequently are not the sole retail outlets.
(END) Dow Jones Newswires
December 12, 2019 08:08 ET (13:08 GMT)
Copyright (c) 2019 Dow Jones & Company, Inc.
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