SHARONA1 (3015) - Nowadays I just say "I make a living from buying and selling shares on the stockmarket".
Most relatives assume I require the market to rise, and say "Oh dear, that must be awfully difficult, the way the markets keep falling" and I just nod and say "Yes, extremely difficult.... there are still rare opportunities but finding them does involve a huge amount of time and effort". - And leave them to assume I must be incredibly clever at finding a way to profit from it. I don't explain that I mostly go short and thereby benefit from market falls..
If pressed for advice on what stocks I favour, so that they themselves might look at buying some, I warn them it's too dangerous in the present climate unless they are able to monitor prices hour by hour or sometimes minute by minute like I do, and are able to sell very quickly when necessary..
;-)
mtg
(If they are unconvinced and send me food parcels I graciously accept them)
